Monthly Archives: January 2015

3 Tips on how to Overcome Fear

 

“Are you a BIG fan of self-development?”

“Have you found that you have written down the same goals, year after year?

“Are you maybe in a good place or even great place in your life, but deep down you know that there’s something missing?”

I used to answer yes to all three of those questions and though I have achieved a minimum of level of success personally and professionally, I always found that I had placed certain limitations on myself and these limitations were what I call the “self-imposing fears.”

So, what are these self-imposed fears?

Well, we have to fear failure fear success, fear change, the unknown or just fear being made fun of. Ultimately, these are fears that we create our own minds and we sell ourselves on not making the decisions and choices that we ultimately want to make.

Once I was able to systematically overcome these self-imposing fears, I was able to achieve better results, and ultimately change my life. I have had the privilege now to work with hundreds of successful proven entrepreneurs all across North America. I’ve also spent the last 12 months in Asia meeting with leaders on that side of the world.

I believe that you are able to hide use these three tips in your day-to-day life,
you’re going to see a dramatic difference and how you are able to overcome your
own self-imposing fear and ultimately make better choices for it.

It does require you to be a bit honest with yourself, but if you’re ready to
throw your ego aside… Let’s jump right into it!

The first step is “Acceptance”

People subconsciously know the situations that create this kind of gripping,
self-imposing year fears in their lives and obviously, it creates these emotions that are
pretty negative. You have the pit in your stomach emotion and you’re almost frozen with indecision. These scenarios can really range from asking for a promotion at work on, chasing what you believed to be your potential dream or even a simple as
asking someone out.

Next time you are faced with these self-imposing fears, it’s important not only to acknowledge it, but to be able to accept the fact that your operating in fear. By naming these emotions it makes everything less scary and the statement itself empowers your brain because it makes it known.

“I’m scared to do XYZ because I fear of rejection, of pain or
just people judging me” Now that would be a good example.

The second is to “learn how to embrace it”

Fear comes from a very negative connotation and we know it creates these negative unwanted feelings, but if we’re able to shift our focus from a negative
to more of a positive one, we realize that it is in the scenarios that we are facing these self- imposing fears that we end up growing the most.

What I mean by that is, whenever you’re actually feeling these fears, it means that you’re doing something different. You have made different decisions, you made different choices, and your body in your mind can’t keep up. Naturally, it feels not at ease, and naturally you feel like there’s a paralysis of fear.

In reality we need to start embracing these moments that we experience fear in because it means that we are constantly making decisions to expand ourselves and we’re constantly moving ourselves out of our comfort zone.

Everyone knows that life stars on the edge if your comfort zone and so we need to create more of an atmosphere in society where we celebrate being in fear and it’s actually a great thing.

Lastly, you want to take massive action!

Going back some the earlier questions up this video I found myself writing down the same goals year after year after year and the reason I wasn’t able to achieve a significant result in any these departments is because I didn’t have the courage
to take massive action.

The funny thing is, the more time you hesitate you allow your brain to fabricate these made up stories that kind of freeze you in inaction. So go out there, and take action jump into it that way you have bypass this brain trick and that’s really the three-step process in terms of being able to overcome any self-imposing fear.

It starts with acceptance up these fears, learning how to embrace them, and taking massive action.

There’s a great quote by Dan Sullivan –
“the problem is never really the problem, the problem is that people don’t even know how to think about the problem”
I hope that this framework gives you a different way of thinking about your own self imposing fears. Go out there and achieve some results!

Please leave me some comments tell me if you get any results from this
Ask me any questions too!

I know what is wrong with human society

Heart pounding. Sweating. Anxiousness “What if I forget the words? What comes after this sentence? Will this make sense? This is it…it’s show time!” It is time to put what I’ve learnt to use; the time has come to public speak in Chinese.

Standing in front of my Chinese class, it dawns on me; a mere 11 months ago (February 2014) I did not even know how to order “chicken fried rice or beef noodles” in Chinese. Now, I speak Chinese on a daily basis. Sure, it does not compare to an actual Chinese native speaker, but I understand newspapers, I understand news, and there is virtually no common topic I cannot decode using a Chinese-English dictionary.

It is truly phenomenal what the human mind can accomplish when one is put in a situation that they MUST succeed. In some ways, it may sound a bit cheesy, but in my case, failure was NOT an option.

Basic communication was on the line. Human connection. To be heard and to be understood. Society is not made to lower itself to your own shortcomings. It is YOU that must bend your beliefs and create the appropriate breakthroughs so that you can properly communicate and be an active participant in society. Everyone person wants to be heard.

This was our final presentation topic. The question at hand – 人类社会存在的问题 (translates to – problem of human society)

My first thought… are you kidding me? I barely know how I would answer that question in English, nevertheless, Mandarin?

Below is the finalized answer/presentation :

“这个问题乍一看很复杂,可是我想来想去,其实很简单。 我们的生活中类似的情况不少。有时候觉得生活太难熬了。有学习压力,或者工作负担, 并且有社会压力。 我们可能以为如果我们干得很辛苦, 我们可以赚到很多钱,然后我们应该得到幸福感。 可是你平时听到或者看到人们在这个世界上不太开心或者完全苦闷。我觉得问题是我们怕追求自己的梦想。

从小的时候教育的制度要求我们去幼儿园, 然后小学,中学, 高中, 最后是大学。如果,你开始工作,每个公司几乎都要求你从最低的职位 爬到最高的。我不能说这两个制度没好处,但是我想指出的问题是每个制度早已给你们他们的计划。很多人,为了钱或者稳定性完全忽略了自己的梦想。

怪不得, 人们到一段时间, 他们发现根本不合适这分工作,或者找到不对的情侣,因而马上离婚。这些小问题之所以存在,是因为很多人没付出时间好好儿思考自己想怎么样活。自己的梦想到底是什么?

说出来这个问题或者说“追求梦想”虽然很悦耳,但是真的做起来没有那么简单。实际上人们不怕自己的梦想,最怕的是追求梦想之中时的失败。你怕你失败的时,全社会的人都笑你,你怕你一辈子都当一位失败者。

无论是谁,凡是每个人肯定都碰到过这些深深的无助的感受,所以每个人都可以互相了解。 怕是怕,不过你不继续追,你永远不知到你可能达到什么结果。你以为有人笑你,但,肯定有人赞成你。

对我来说,每个人都想了解自己的才能,以后用功集中发挥自己的本领。教育应该教你什么解决各种各样的问题。打工应该为你提供你工作经验,而且帮你建立生活中重要的关系。 我相信如果我们可以克服自己怕什么,我们可以活得 更幸福,而且热心地解决全球的问题。

我要趁着这个机会,给你们介绍一句俗话:“失败是成功之母。”

如果你需要有一天说出来你成功, 你先需要失败。这句话也没说你需要失败了几次。可能好多几次。。。

我们只有一次生命。我们应该一起支持每个人追求自己的梦想,也因此我们可以影响其他的人与他们一起面临社会的问题。”

Here is the English translation : (This is taken directly from Google Translate. Even Google is not perfect at translating Chinese to English.)

At first glance, this problem is very complex, but to my mind, is actually very simple. Our lives a similar situation a lot. Sometimes I think life is too tough a. Learning pressure, or workload, and social pressures. We may think that if we do very hard, we can make a lot of money, then we deserve happiness. But you usually hear or see people in this world do not feel happy or completely depressed. I think the problem is that we are afraid to pursue their dreams.

When childhood education system, which requires us to go to kindergarten, and elementary school, middle school, high school, and finally the university. If you start working, almost every company requires you to climb from the lowest of the highest positions. I cannot say that these two systems is not good, but I want to point out that the problem is that each system has already given you their plans. Many people, for the money or the stability of completely ignoring their dreams.

No wonder, people go to for some time, they found it inappropriate simply divide the work, or to find a couple of wrong, and therefore divorce immediately. These small problems exists, because many people do not choose to take their time thinking about their gonna live. His dream in the end is what?

Say the problem or “dreams” Although very sweet, but really it is not so simple to do. In fact people are not afraid of their dreams, fear of failure when the pursuit of dream. Are you afraid when you fail, the whole society of people laugh at you, you are afraid of your life are when a loser.

No matter who you are, everyone who certainly have come across these deep feelings of helplessness, so that everyone can understand each other. Fear is fear, but you do not continue to chase, you never know what the results that you may achieve. Do you think someone laugh at you, but certainly someone agree with you.

For me, everyone wants to know their talents, after hard play to their ability to concentrate. Education should teach you what to solve a variety of problems. Your work should provide work experience for you, and help you build important relationships in life. I believe that if we can overcome what they fear, we can live happier and enthusiasm to solve global problems.

I want to take advantage of this opportunity to introduce you to a saying: “Failure is the mother of success.”

If you need one day say you are successful, you first need to fail. This statement did not say you need to fail a few times. Probably a lot of times. . .

We have only one life. Together we should support everyone to pursue their dreams, and therefore we can influence others with their problems facing the community together.

—–
Society has a plethora of problems and no one thing will solve everything immediately. Perhaps, we have to be responsible for our own lives and fears before we can start preaching to others how the world should be changed.

A couple things you should ponder as you make this year’s resolutions

– What are some accomplishments that you have achieved in 2014 you can celebrate? (This only works looking backwards, not measuring yourself forward against who you think you “should” be. Be grateful for what you have done, who are you, and the people in your life)

– As we have just kicked off a NEW YEAR (2015), what is your dream? Do you dare to chase it now? Are you ready to fail first? (Probably a lot of failing)
Please comment and share your answers below!!! Will respond MORE consistently!

Signed,

A more frequent writer than last year.

PS. Chicken Fried Rice : 鸡炒饭 Beef Noodles : 牛肉面

chickenbeef